Sunday 29 December 2013

BOXING DAY


Boxing day numbers were added to by Alan & Jane who live nearby, and more games were played for some seriously valuable prizes like egg timers and pens etc.







XMAS DAY


What a trip over for the Lancaster family for Xmas.
Firstly the ferry from Pompey to Le Havre was cancelled, so they re-routed from Dover to Dunkirk. That also included an overnight in the ferry car park whilst the storm blew over.
Over 30 hours after leaving home they made it here at 7pm on Xmas Eve.


Xmas day was spent at the Auberge in the village for an excellent lunch.


Then it was back home to open the tradition pack of socks and play some party games.





Wednesday 18 December 2013

THE 2013 LA SAUDRAIE XMAS PANTO.


From the people that bought you 
The Adventure that was...
Dogs Poster Mash-Up

The Children's Classic that was...
Dogs Poster Mash-Up

The Sci-Fi  that was...
Dogs Poster Mash-Up

The Wartime Adventure that was...
Dogs Poster Mash-Up
The Violence that was...
Dogs Poster Mash-Up

The Oscar winner that was...
Dogs Poster Mash-Up

The Gay Iconic Movie that was...
Dogs Poster Mash-Up

And the sheer Horror that was..
Dogs Poster Mash-Up

COMES THE NEW ADVENTURE.

"SANTA CLAUS AND THE 3 WISE DOGS OF DIFFERENT CLASSES."

The 3 dogs had decided to visit Santa as they all wanted to hear about the story of Xmas, and also to bring presents for the baby Jesus.
Shep was first. 
"Read me a bit about Xmas Santa"
"Ho ho ho!" Said Santa.
"All in good time"
"First of all, what present did you bring for the baby Jesus?"



Shep being a bit posh but had fallen on hard times thanks to Cameron's shoddy government said.
"I went to Cash Converters and exchanged all my bones for money, with which I bought gold, so I have brought some bling for the infant king" (Great when it rhymes)


"That's very noble of you" said Santa,
"But how will you get all your lovely bones back from Cash Converters, what with their massive interest rates?"


"Not to worry" said Shep. " I am an intelligent Collie Dog. I can
get work on any farm I like guarding sheep, and if I work really hard, I will soon have saved up to get all my lovely bones back. Once I have paid my 25% to the government of course.


Next up was Arthur.
"Ho Ho Ho!" said Santa.
"And what have you bought for the baby Jesus?"
Arthur being working class had also come by hard times.
"Well I was supposed to bring Frankincense but that's a bit hard to 
come by now days, so I bought a Brut gift box. Same thing, it's all perfume in my book. 
I was a bit short on dough, so I went to Wonga.com to pay for the gift." 



"Good grief" Said Santa.
"Wonga charge stupid rates. It will take you
years to pay them back even for this very cheap gift.
How will you ever cope?" 


"Don't worry" Said Arthur bearing his teeth in mock anger.
"I work nights doing security on a building site. If I work really hard and bang in a bit of overtime, i'll soon be able to pay my loan off, once I have paid all my taxes to Mr Cameron as well.
With a bit of luck they might have mis-sold me PPI as well, so I could be quids in!


Next up was Bella.
"Ho Ho Ho!" Said Santa.
"I bet you don't know the story of Jesus and how he was
born in a manger. I'll give you a shiny shilling if you can tell me what a manger is?"
"That's easy" said Bella.
A manger is someone who coaches an East End Football club.
Like 'Arry' Redknapp is the manger of Queens Park Rangers."

"And what have you bought for the baby Jesus young Bella?"
Bella being a bone idle dog hadn't worked a day in her life and was very lower class.
"I ain't bought Jack shit"

"Well that's not the festive spirit is it?" Said Santa. 





"No it probably ain't, but I don't give a flying.
Give me five Santa and I'll tell you why I is a lazy bitch.
I don't have to work. I got pregnant twice as a young pup. That gave me 14 kids, so the benefits are ace.
The 2 fathers are also paying me a monthly allowance for the pups which covers my booze and fags.
I also get a free kennel for me and the sprogs to live in, with SKY TV in every room.
My heating is paid for, I get job seekers (tho I ain't lookin'),
and food credits.
Thank you Mr Cameron!
Why do I need to work to earn money for presents?"


"You are so right" Said Santa.
"It's bollocks. I'm handing my P45 in on Xmas Eve.
It's damn hard work going round the world delivering presents to all those snotty bloody kids"
I don't need it.
A life on the Social for me from now on"

MORAL OF THE STORY.
Go to work, and you will be screwed.
Get screwed and you will be rewarded.

THE END.

COMING SOON
Dogs Poster Mash-Up

THE GARDHOUSE PLAYERS
WISH ALL READERS OF THIS
BLOG.
A VERY MERRY XMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR.

Tuesday 17 December 2013

XMAS PARTY


Sunday there was a Xmas get together at the Cheval Blanc in Plancoet.
Mostly ex pats, and a few French, and ....



AN AUSSIE!
Just my luck to meet up with Cathy, as soon as the English Ashes humiliation was complete.
Despite my informed instruction on what was wrong with England's batting and bowling, it really didn't matter.
You can't win the Ashes with a Satsuma!


I have got up most mornings at 3am to watch the cricket.
Thankfully for the last 2 tests I won't have to.
Well done England.

XMAS IS COMING



Just a week to Xmas and Marie has made the cake decorations.
Even I have to admit they are quite good!

Wednesday 11 December 2013

2014 EVENTS




If you are thinking of visiting in 2014, of course you are welcome anytime.
But if you want to tie it in with a local event, here is the village "fun days" for next year.

Sat 1 March. Football club dinner.
Sun 6 July. Country show and BBQ lunch
Sun 13 July. Bastille Day Pig Roast
Sat 9  August. Moules frittes at the lake. Outside night disco.
11Nov. Armistice day Lunch. (I am a speaker)

WINTER ARRIVES


The last for nights have bought a hard frost to St Potan.
AT least the house is nice and warm with the new double glazing and the wood burner chucking out some serious heat.


The weekends before Xmas sees the local hunt out blasting anything that moves just to make sure they have something on their plate for the festive season.
We have taken no chances and stuck high viz jackets on the dogs.


The hard frost doesn't stop Shep digging deep for mice, and to our horror actually caught one this week and swallowed it whole.


Despite the cold, it's still a pleasant quiet walk across the countryside.


Tuesday 3 December 2013

FARM SITTING



Marie volunteered to look after Bill and Sue's small holding in Plancoet for 5 days.
A selection of poultry, goats, and two cats had to be fed and watered.
Nice enough place but even more out in the sticks than we are.
Talk about quiet.


NOT MUCH NEWS


This is probably the longest time since I made a post, and that's because November is pretty much a quiet month.
And it was even quieter when Marie went back to "Pastyland for a few days to visit her folks.


Highlight was visiting Aileen and Dean to see the new baby.



After Pastyland, she went up to Essex to catch up with cousins before flying home.